by Roedy Green ©1996-2009 Canadian Mind Products |
recommend book⇒Your Road Map to Lifelong Happiness: A Guide to the Life You Want | ||
| paperback | hardcover | ||
|---|---|---|---|
| ISBN13: | 978-0-915972-23-4 | 978-0-915972-22-7 | |
| ISBN10: | 0-915972-23-9 | 0-915972-22-0 | |
| publisher: | Love Line | ||
| published: | 1995-06-19 | ||
| by: | Ken Keyes Jr. | ||
| Ken’s last book finished just before he died. He introduces EMDR, Harville Hendrix, Ron Kurtz’s Hakomi and other therapies as much faster ways of getting rid of addictions than using his classic methods. | |||
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recommend book⇒Reinventing Your Life : How to Break Free from Negative Life Patterns and Feel Good Again | ||
| paperback | hardcover | ||
|---|---|---|---|
| ISBN13: | 978-0-452-27204-0 | 978-0-525-93584-1 | |
| ISBN10: | 0-452-27204-1 | 0-525-93584-3 | |
| publisher: | Plume | ||
| published: | 1994-05-01 | ||
| by: | Jeffrey E. Young, Janet S. Klosko, Aaron T. Beck | ||
| Ken had nothing to do with writing this book, but he highly recommended it, and near the end of his life, taught its techniques. I too highly recommend it. | |||
The basic idea is you are still reacting as if you were a child. You have to go back to childhood and relive the corresponding traumatic events with your adult understanding. Once you do that, your adult reactions become more rational too. You find the key events by asking yourself when you are suffering, "What is the earliest time in my life I felt this way?" For example, your fear of meeting people now may have been burned into you on your first day of school when the other kids beat the heck out of you.
Here is an example from my own life. About my earliest memory is when I was two living on Cook street in Victoria. The next door neigbour girl had a dog, Barney trained to bring in the paper. She invited me over to her house, possibly for some sex play (I started young), or to play with the dog. As we were going through the gate she asked me to put my thumb on the mechanism. I complied. Then she slammed the gate shut on my thumb, and giggled with glee. It hurt mightily. I told myself "Never trust females again!!".
All my life, females have betrayed me in various ways, reinforcing this belief that none of them can be trusted. See core beliefs and the law of attraction. In 2000-07-01 I revisted this incident with adult understanding. My friend/therapist suggested restating that as "Never trust that little girl again!!". I thought about it, and said, "That makes sense". Ever since all my relations with females have taken a dramatic turn for the better. Females flirt with me everywhere, and I enjoy it! — me a gay male.
Further, we tend to abuse ourselves as adults in the same way we were abused as children. Many of us have a tyrannical internal voice constantly belittling our every effort.
There are 11 different lifetraps:
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