Misattributed George Bush Quotations

Bush Did Not Say

disrobe or be dismembered.
~ misattributed to George W. Bush spoof of Bush’s weapons inspection policy, Threatening Saddam Hussein with penectomy but probably meant disarm or be disarmed.

If the President said he wanted Saddam to disrobe, then the President meant what he said and Saddam should disrobe.
~ misattributed Ari Fleischer , White House Press Secretary
at the McKinley Society, a conservative think tank, 2003-02-28
For a hidden weapon cavity search presumably.
This is a hoax.

I don’t know why I should have to learn Algebra… I’m never likely to go there.
~ Billy Connolly (1942-11-24 age:75) sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush.

What colour is the red phone?
~ Bill Maher (1956-01-20 age:62) teasing Bush’s stupidity.

All the waste in a year from a nuclear power plant can be stored under a desk.
~ Ronald Reagan (1911-02-06 2004-06-05 age:93), sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush. That is quite some desk, with 22,000 cubic feet of drawer space.

Permanent brain damage is one of the inevitable results of the use of marijuana.
~ Ronald Reagan (1911-02-06 2004-06-05 age:93), 1974 LA Times, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

Facts are stupid things.
~ Ronald Reagan (1911-02-06 2004-06-05 age:93), 1988, misquoting John Adams, Facts are stubborn things. sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

Trees cause pollution.
~ Ronald Reagan (1911-02-06 2004-06-05 age:93), sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

How could someone so monumentally stupid generate such reverence?

Welcome to George W. Bush, Mrs. Bush and my fellow astronauts.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), Bush senior’s other idiot stepson. Sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush.

For NASA (National Aeronautics and Space Administration), space is still a high priority.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71) 1990-09-05, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush
Does it have any other priority?

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history. I mean in this century’s history. But we all lived in this century. I didn’t live in this century.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), 1988-09-15, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

Mars is essentially in the same orbit. Mars is somewhat the same distance from the sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen that means we can breathe.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), 1994-08-11, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush
Imagine a Cheneyesque sigh, where to I begin.

• Mars’ orbit is further out from the sun than earth. 59,000 megameters (36,660,900.34 miles) further out, about third further out.
• There are no canals. A very early astronomer, Percival Lowell, thought he saw some. This was in the days before celestial photography.
• Yes, water has been found, but no oxygen. You can’t breathe on Mars. It is not a Star Trek class M planet. To breathe, you would need to split the water using electricity (hydrolysis) into oxygen and hydrogen.

It’s time for the human race to enter the solar system.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor and that one word is to be prepared.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), 1993-06-12, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

I stand by all the misstatements that I’ve made.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71) to Sam Donaldson, 1993-08-17, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

We have a firm commitment to NATO (North Atlantic Treaty Organisation), we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

The future will be better tomorrow.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), 1995-09-18, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush.

We’re going to have the best educated American people in the world.
~ Dan Quayle (1947-02-04 age:71), 1997-09-27, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.
~ Mad Magazine (1952 age:65) spoofing Dan Quayle 1991-05, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.
~ Mad Magazine (1952 age:65) spoofing Dan Quayle 1991-05, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush

It isn’t pollution that is harming our environment, its the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.
~ Mad Magazine (1952 age:65) spoofing Dan Quayle 1991-05, sometimes misattributed to George W. Bush.

Ossifer, I am not, emfeesize not, under the affluence of incohol.
~ Anonymous , misattributed to George W. Bush

We’ve wanted so many wars and we didn’t get them. And we’ve wanted this one for years.
~ misattributed to George W. Bush reported by Charles Richard on TV. Actually said by One of Washington’s pro-war cheerleeders

We’re an empire now and we create our own reality.
~ Bush senior adviser , New York Times Magazine, 2004-10-17

The reason we start a war is to fight a war, win a war, thereby causing no more war!
~ misattributed to George W. Bush supposedly in the first Gore-Bush Presidential debate, 2000-10-03.

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